Hamsters
by LoveBackwards
Summary: One-Shot. Bankotsu is convinced he can handle a new pet and Renkotsu highly doubts him. *Inspired by a conversation with BewilderedLoca!*


Disclaimer: I do not own Inuyasha.

-

"Bankotsu…what'd you do?" Renkotsu asked in a bored tone as Bankotsu quickly paced by him and for his room.

"Nothing." He smiled innocently.

"School just got out, and not only did you come home right away, you're practically running for your room." He rolled his eyes.

"I didn't do anything." He shrugged and squirmed a little from where he stood. Renkotsu cocked his head.

"You alright?"

"Huh? Oh yeah…fine…" His eyes got wide.

"Bankotsu…just tell me before I find out and get pissed…" He started.

"Ren, it's nothing, ok?" There was a short pause.

"I don't buy it." Renkotsu finally answered. Bankotsu gasped and held his crotch. "What the hell?"

"Ok, ok…it's this…" He grunted and dug through his jean pocket. He pulled out a fluff-ball and held it directly in front of Renkotsu's face.

"Ah! What the hell?" Renkotsu fell backwards in his chair.

"Um, rude much?" Bankotsu glared as the small hamster crawled in his hand. He softly petted it with his free hand.

"Bankotsu, where did you find that thing?"

"Actually, _that thing_ happens to have a name and it's Fluffy." Bankotsu corrected and Renkotsu rolled his eyes.

"Where did you get Fluffy?"

"I stole him." He smiled. "He was just so cute, weren't you, buddy?" He held the hamster up to his face and smiled. "Ah! He bit my nose!" Bankotsu dropped him and Renkotsu jumped so he was standing on his chair.

"Get it!"

"I'm on it!" Bankotsu flung the couch upside down and the hamster ran for the kitchen with Bankotsu hot on his heels. Renkotsu growled and watched them. He heard a crash, a thud, and a glass shatter before Bankotsu returned with his hands cupped around the creature.

"He's never done that before." Bankotsu frowned.

"How long have you had it?" Renkotsu asked as he fixed the couch. He didn't dare to see what was in the kitchen.

"I don't know…ten minutes." He shrugged.

"And you had it stuffed in your pocket?" Renkotsu asked in disbelief.

"No, I was holding him on the way home…talking to him, ya know. Warning him about you and telling him about Spike…I only put him in there when I walked in the door so you wouldn't freak. Then he bit my nads…just now." Bankotsu explained and Renkotsu sighed, imagining how crazy his brother must've looked during the walk home.

"Why did you steal him?"

"Hakudoshi put him in the sidewalk and was going to run him over with his bike! I had to save him!" He explained again and Renkotsu disapprovingly shook his head.

"You expect me to believe Hakudoshi would kill a hamster?"

"He's done it before! Didn't you hear what happened to Snuggles?"

"No, I'm afraid I haven't." Renkotsu rolled his eyes.

"Well first…"

"I don't want to know, Bankotsu." He cut his brother off.

"Right…so….can I keep him?" He asked innocently.

"Bankotsu…lets review you're pets, shall we?"

"Not this again…" Bankotsu rolled his eyes. "He's just gunna lie to scare you." Bankotsu whispered to his new friend.

"What happened to your parakeets?" Renkotsu asked.

"I let them fly."

"Why?"

"Because I wanted to see if they could really fly notes to other people."

"Did you ever see them again?" Renkotsu crossed his arms.

"No." Bankotsu groaned.

"What happened to Pluto?"

"You swore never to speak of him! May God rest his soul." Bankotsu whispered and Renkotsu rolled his eyes.

"You wanted to play fetch with you're ridiculous toy poodle on a fucking high way!"

"I thought he was quick!" Bankotsu defended.

"And when you decided to see if you're pet frog could avoid traffic like they do in that stupid video game?" Renkotsu asked.

"I thought he could really pull that off! Ribbit was smart and all you ever did was knock him down…and that was _not_ a dumb game!" He argued.

"Alright, tell me, what happened to Kitty…you're pet rat?"

"He loved you…what was wrong with him?"

"It was a foot long rat that you put in my bed while I was sleeping!" Renkotsu snapped.

"Oh yeah!" Bankotsu smiled. "What ever happened to him?" He scratched his chin.

"Don't worry about it." Renkotsu mumbled and Bankotsu glared.

"I knew you did something to him."

"Ok, how about when you were supposed to watch Koga's dog, Sparky?" Renkotsu reminded.

"Hey, it is not my fault!"

"Bankotsu, you threw the ball out the tenth story window!" Renkotsu challenged.

"I thought it was closed! And Kouga still thinks he's just missing!"

"I think that a giant splat of blood and a German Shepard below his window gave it away." Renkotsu glared.

"He was stupid! If he were smart he wouldn't have jumped out the window, duh." Bankotsu rolled his eyes.

"Bankotsu, I'm surprised Spike's still alive!"

"Renkotsu, all I need to do is feed him…"

"You only needed to feed Sparky, too…" Renkotsu mumbled.

"Look…I want Spike to have a friend….how can you refuse that little face?" Bankotsu gave puppy dog eyes and held up his new found pet.

"A fish and a hamster cannot interact." Renkotsu massaged his temples.

"But when I'm not here to talk to Spike and you ignore him he has no one…please?" Bankotsu whined.

"You realize it's a big responsibility?"

"Yes!"

"What about a cage?"

"Can hamsters swim?" He blinked.

"No!' Renkotsu snapped.

"Are you sure?"

"Yes." Renkotsu said through his teeth.

"Alright…I have an extra fish bowl." Bankotsu shrugged.

"Dare I ask…why?"

"You know…when Bubbles died…" Bankotsu looked to his feet.

"I thought Spike had Bubbles' bowl." Renkotsu cocked his head.

"What? That's just sick! Putting a goldfish where another goldfish died…_what_ is wrong with you? Were you dropped on your head?" Bankotsu barked.

"You're putting a hamster where a goldfish died."

"Sh." Bankotsu whispered and pointed in his palm to Fluffy. "He doesn't know…plus, they're different species." He explained and Renkotsu rolled his eyes.

"What about food?"

"I have some BK French fries under my bed." Bankotsu shrugged and Renkotsu scrunched his nose.

"How old are they?"

"Two weeks! They're still good." Bankotsu smiled and Renkotsu twisted his face in disgust.

"Hamsters don't eat fries."

"Sure they do!" Bankotsu assured.

"Fine…it stays in your room though!"

"Got it!" Bankotsu ran in his room with a smile on his face.

-

Renkotsu sighed. It had been a few hours now and Bankotsu was still in his room with that ugly, red-eyed, black hamster. He heard his brother's muffled voice through the door and sighed again before opening it.

"Bankotsu, dinner's ready."

"Oh, ok…can I eat in here? I feel kind of bad leaving Spike with somebody he doesn't know." He shrugged. Renkotsu rolled his eyes and glanced at the bowl on the nightstand and the empty one. 'Fluffy' was on Bankotsu's shoulder and nipping his earlobe.

"I guess…"

"I said stop…" Bankotsu laughed and put the hamster on his lap.

"Would you like me to grab Fluffy something?" He asked sarcastically.

"Who?" Bankotsu cocked his head.

"Fluffy…your hamster." Renkotsu reminded.

"Oh, about that…yeah…I changed his name."

"Why?"

"Snickerdoodles just sounds so much cooler." He smiled and Renkotsu rolled his eyes.

"Snickerdoodles?"

"Yeah…is something wrong with that?"

"Nothing, Bankotsu…nothing at all." He groaned.

"Cool so uh…no, he's set with those fries." He shrugged.

"Bankotsu…what's that at the bottom of your hamster's bowl?" Renkotsu pointed.

"Oh, uh…Snickerdoodles needed a bed.' He shrugged.

"So what did you use?"

"Well…you're bandana was kinda old lookin' so….hah…" He nervously laughed.

"My bandana?" Renkotsu growled.

"Just look at his precious face!" Bankotsu held up the tiny hamster. He set him in the bowl, ultimately on Renkotsu's bandana.

"I swear Bankotsu…"

"Hey, let's go eat…I think Spike can keep Snickerdoodles busy." Bankotsu shrugged.

-

Renkotsu stirred as he felt the bottom of his blanket get lifted off his feet. He rolled on his side and groggily opened his eyes and looked down. He saw a figure peeking under the blanket and instinctively kicked.

He sat up and recognized the figure as Bankotsu's. his younger brother was lying on his back and holding his head. Renkotsu sighed and turned on the light on he nightstand.

"What are you doing?" Renkotsu crossed his arms.

"Nothing." Bankotsu got to his feet.

"You lost Snickerdoodle…didn't you?"

"No!" Bankotsu defended.

"Then what happened?"

"I lost Jolly Rancher."

"You lost who?" He yelled.

"Sh, you'll wake Spike!"

"Bankotsu, who the hell is Jolly Rancher?"

"The pet hamster I snuck in about a month ago…" He sheepishly looked down.

"Bankotsu!"

"He was cute and…yeah….Hiten was gunna let him go so…I took him."

"What the hell does he look like?"

"Well…he's like really fat, you could almost classify him as a mouse, he's grey and has a white stripe down his back…and…he has the most adorable black, beady eyes." He explained.

"Why did you name him Jolly Rancher?"

"Because he's so damn jolly." Bankotsu shrugged.

"And where has he been living?"

"In your underwear slash porn drawer." He smiled.

"I-I don't have a porn drawer!" Renkotsu felt his face get hot.

"Sure ya do…where do you think I steal mines from?" Bankotsu asked.

"How come I didn't notice it?"

"He's in my room during the day…he only sleeps in there." Renkotsu rolled his eyes.

"Fine…you search the living room, I'll take the kitchen." Renkotsu crawled out of bed and Bankotsu nodded.

"You got any pizza?"

"Pizza?"

"Yeah….Jolly likes Pizza." Bankotsu explained.

"No." Renkotsu glared and went in the kitchen. He sighed, opened the fridge, and pulled out the box of leftover pizza. He placed it on the ground and waited. No less than a minute later, a grey hamster ran in the room and on the pizza. Renkotsu sighed and picked it up.

"Stupid pets." He glared and watched it curl up in his hand. He glanced around to make sure nobody was looking and softly stroked its head. "You aren't so bad…" He shrugged and smiled a little.

"Find him, Ren?" Bankotsu called.

"No…it doesn't matter, I'm going to sleep." He called back.

"Jerk!" He heard Bankotsu and quickly went in his room. He opened his underwear drawer and placed him in.

"Don't worry, I wont let him traumatize you." He smiled and shut the drawer.

It was too sweet for Bankotsu to torture. He sighed and went to sleep.


End file.
